Bar Talk II
Me: [Drinking draught beer. Looking at sports on several television sets. Silent]
Him: What was that?
Me: I’m sorry?
Him: Damn right you sorry.
Me: [The smirk creeps to my face during the pause] Is there a problem?
Him: They’s about to be if you look at me again.
Me: [Long pause. Bigger smirk] Ok, Brother. I’ll try to stop doin’ that.
Him: Goddamn right you will.
Me: [Smiling at TV] Alright. I’ll see what I can do.
Him: [Turning on barstool toward me] You fuckin’ with me?
Me: [Turning my head, locking eyes] Not yet.
[We hold the staredown for a moment]
Bartender: [Setting a fresh draught in front of me] Anything wrong, Boys?
Me: [Maintaining stare] No. I think we’re good. [Pause] But give this gentleman a beer on my tab if you would.
Him: [Turning away] Pussy.
Me: [Turning back to face TV] Yeah. I like it too.
Him: [Picks up his new beer, stands, and walks away]
Bartender: Don’t worry ‘bout him, Sugar. Kyle just likes to do that.
Me: [Smiling big]
[I drink two more beers, cash out, and leave. Watching my back all the way to the Jeep]
Him: What was that?
Me: I’m sorry?
Him: Damn right you sorry.
Me: [The smirk creeps to my face during the pause] Is there a problem?
Him: They’s about to be if you look at me again.
Me: [Long pause. Bigger smirk] Ok, Brother. I’ll try to stop doin’ that.
Him: Goddamn right you will.
Me: [Smiling at TV] Alright. I’ll see what I can do.
Him: [Turning on barstool toward me] You fuckin’ with me?
Me: [Turning my head, locking eyes] Not yet.
[We hold the staredown for a moment]
Bartender: [Setting a fresh draught in front of me] Anything wrong, Boys?
Me: [Maintaining stare] No. I think we’re good. [Pause] But give this gentleman a beer on my tab if you would.
Him: [Turning away] Pussy.
Me: [Turning back to face TV] Yeah. I like it too.
Him: [Picks up his new beer, stands, and walks away]
Bartender: Don’t worry ‘bout him, Sugar. Kyle just likes to do that.
Me: [Smiling big]
[I drink two more beers, cash out, and leave. Watching my back all the way to the Jeep]
posted by Ryan at 8:01 PM
3 Comments:
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Nice save! I'm pretty sure *Kyle* or one of his relatives drinks in my watering hole too. His pickup methods aren't much more effective than his making friends techniques.
Heheh. Last week I was at a little bar called Beyond the Edge. This guy looked at me ... stared ... and said, "My God, has anyone ever told you that you have a pretty mouth?!"
I swear I could hear banjo music.
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